Closet Costumes: Using a Yellow Dress

Yellow is mellow, but that doesn't mean you can't bring it out for Halloween (you can tell I'm a little brain dead writing this one). If you haven't already, the previous "Closet Costumes" posts are here: using plaid shirts, a beige skirt and black thigh-high socks. These were each brainstormed, created, and photographed in 30 minutes or less (with items I already own). Shout with any more ideas using yellow dresses!

If You Need One: Halter Yellow Dress, Yellow Shift Dress, Yellow Slip Dress

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1. Hipster "Don't-Give-A-Fuck" Snow White

You want to keep my heart in a locked box? You talk to your own mirror? Evil Queen, you basic. The most important thing about this costume is your chill, bad ass attitude and your delicious, red apple. Oh, and if you fall asleep because you just a little bit too much Halloween candy, just hope no guys will even dare try to kiss you awake. That's just rude manners, you know?

Note: Poison not included with apple (and also not recommended).

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2. Amy from Trainwreck

Similar: Paperbag for your shenanigans

The easiest costume. And it also allows you to keep your drink concealed in public areas so the party doesn't slow down no matter where you are. But this is by no means an endorsement to drink in public areas and be a debaucherous hooligan. I repeat, by no means.

And if you haven't seen Trainwreck yet, it's a pretty good laugh and a nice change of pace in terms of the usual comedy you've been seeing in Rom Coms lately. It drags on for a bit and gets a bit stale in terms of the plot, but I enjoyed it nevertheless.

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3. Hot Mess Yellow Teletubby

Similar: Black Jelly Sandals

Because if a Teletubby is going to romping around on Halloween, you know it's going to be a hot mess. Just smack on a paper screen (bonus points if it's half dangling off your dress because, yes, that was intentional on my part...heh), cut out your fly head piece, and voila! You're all set to go do whatever it is that Teletubbies did. 

Hold On To Your Hats, Kids


Forever 21 Black Knit Cardigan (similar), Urban Outfitters Gray Crop Top (similar)American Apparel Chiffon Polka Dot Skirt (similar), HUE Olive Green Tights (similar), Black Suede Flats c/o LuLu*s (similar), Urban Outfitters Black Mini-Backpack (similar), Volcom Olive Green Felt Hat (similar)

Literally. Hold on to your hats, because it's too windy to function out. But also, hold on to your hats because TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN AND YAS YAS YAS. The best part about New York City during the Halloween season, is riding the subways and playing the game of "Costume? or Not?" You can never really tell in the city and there's no good way to ask because, more times than not, it's not a costume and then you proceed to be awkward. I remember one year I half-assed a Skrillex costume, and when the bouncer at the bar was checking my ID, he sighs and (with loads of judgement) goes, "I guess you decided not to get into the Halloween spirit, huh?" And before I had time to explain myself, he ushered me along. Judgmental bouncer, two years later I still shake my fist at you!

Keep an eye out for more costumes later this evening, if you're still looking for last minute ideas! And tomorrow, super last minute couple/duo costumes, because I like to make Jeremy suffer in front of the camera and brainstorm costume ideas.


Closet Costumes: Using Plaid Shirts

So I cheated with this one and used three different plaid shirts, but all is forgiven because everyone is obsessed with plaid no matter what color it is because it's fall and everyone is a little bit basic. Agreed? Agreed. Just like the previous two posts using a beige skirt and black thigh-high socks, these were brainstormed, created, and photographed in 30 minutes or less (with items I already own). Shout with any more ideas using plaid shirts!

If You Need One: Orange Plaid ShirtRed Plaid Shirt, Green Plaid Shirt

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1. Scarecrow

Similar: Jean Short Overalls 

All this takes is a little bit of eyeliner all over your face. Also, I highly recommend taking it to the next level and being a Zombie Scarecrow, because then you get to wear MORE crap on your face which is always fun. Also, the messier your hair the better. If you also happen to have straw lying around your house like a normal human being, just shove that shit everywhere: your pockets, your hair, your armpits. Well, maybe not your armpits due to the itch factor. Then, just stand outside and wait for the birds to arrive. You're a scarecrow. Own it.

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2. Arnold from Hey Arnold!

Similar: Turquoise Sweater, Blue Jeggings, Black Flats, Blue Cap

So if I could honestly dress up as any Hey Arnold! character, it would 100% be Gerald. He's the most bad ass out of all of the characters and let's be real here, the older you get, the more you realize that sometimes Arnold is a straight up jerk...even though he means well. But I could never do Gerald's beautiful set of hair justice so I had to opt for his side kick (in my eyes), Arnold.

Note: Football Head not included.

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3. Bitch from Slytherin

Similar: Black Blazer, Black Pleather Skirt, Slytherin Scarf, Black Ankle Strap Heels

A few years ago, my friends and I made an impromptu road trip all the way to Hogwarts, and I picked up a Slytherin scarf since I'm a Slytherin. Well...I wanted to be a Slytherin and there are parts of me that absolutely qualify me to join Snape and his hooligans. BUT, after being very honest with myself, I realized that I am indeed a Hufflepuff. Which explains why my wand is, in fact, a chopstick.

Anything items you want to see featured next? Anything from my closet? Girl, tell me what you want, what you really really want.

Closet Costumes Using: A Beige Skirt

Next up on Closet Costumes (episode numero one here), I present to you...costumes using a beige- or cream-colored skirt. The most basic of basics but so handy when it comes to last-minute costumes. This time, the costumes are definitely ranked from most favorite to slightly less favorite but, as always, they were all brainstormed, created, and photographed in 30 minutes or less. Shout with any more ideas using this skirt! 

If You Need One: Midi Beige Skirt, Suede Beige Skirt, Tulle Skirt

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1. Claire from Jurassic World

Similar: Cream Blouse, Lavender Dress, Nude Heels

Look at this bad bitch. I know there was a lot of controversy around it, but Claire in Jurassic Park owned running in heels...away from a T-Rex. Seriously, if you haven't seen Jurassic World yet, please add it to the top of your list this year. It's not the best movie you've ever seen, but you can never say "No" to epic dinosaurs beating the crap out of each other and being glorious motherfuckers. Also, Chris Pratt.

Also, the outtakes from shooting this costume are just horrible and brilliant at the same time.

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2. Bubble Tea

Similar: Nude Bodysuit, Nude Sandals

I now have an immense craving for Bubble Tea. If you've got some extra construction paper around (seriously, that stuff is gold so buy it in bulk and keep it around), cut out some black circles to be the tapioca and pick any color to be your abnormally large straw. If you cut the end of the straw into little strips, you can bend them flat against your head and pin them down with the magic of bobby pins. Now the only danger is going into the world looking so damn delicious and making it back home alive.

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3. Ice Cream Cone

Similar: White Crop Top, Peach Suede Sandals

I could not be more excited about this costume because I look like such a butt. Like, bobby pinning a felt tomato on your head...upside-down...does not make it a cherry to top your pitiful looking ice cream cone costume. But somehow, it kind of also totally does. Looking stupid becomes okay once you own looking stupid. You know who did think this was a stupid costume though? Bubba. Why? Because I bought him an x-small banana costume which only covers 1/3 of his large, fluffy body, and I tried to get him to be a banana split with me. Happiness did not ensue and Bubba spent the rest of the day pouting at me. But then again that might have just been his face.

Anything items you want to see featured next? Anything from my closet? Girl, tell me what you want, what you really really want.

My Head Dressed Up As an Olive for Halloween


Forever 21 Brown Dolman Coat (similar), White Drop-waist Dress c/o LuLu*s (similar, similar), H&M Black Thigh-High Socks (similar, similar), Aldo Black Oxford Suede Wedges (similar), H&M Dark Green Knit Beanie (similar, similar)

This apartment complex that I'm standing next to accurately represents what's going on in my head right now. I'm 100% focused on this week's Halloween festivities and I can't wait for all the spooky shit to go down. The week is full of Halloween activities including some PR events and my company's Halloween party (for which I'm freaking out on the costume front). To have your first work party at a new company be Halloween-themed makes it even harder to meet new people since they'll look completely different the next day at work. Both because they'll be out of costume and hungover.

But now the biggest problem I'm tackling is how to get enough candy to hand out at the door without having to resort to all the overpriced Halloween candy. Hopefully, some silly store forgot to markup their sweet noms. Hopefully.


Closet Costumes Using: Black Thigh-High Socks

With all the Halloween costume panic vibes that the majority of people around me are giving off, both at work and outside of work, I can't help but feel the same anxiety as I start ravaging Pinterest for ideas. But then my wallet starts getting a little nervous as I scroll through ideas that require me to get either too elaborate or spend too much money.

So, I present to you, Closet Costumes. A series of costume ideas that revolve around one item in my closet, starting with my beloved black thigh-high socks. Everything featured was pulled from things I already owned and each costume was brainstormed, created, and photographed in 30 minutes or less (for you lazy bastards like myself). YOU CAN DO THIS TOO, YOU HALLOWEEN WARRIOR.


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1. The Classic Mime



Is it cheating if I swap out one black thigh-high sock with a white thigh-high sock? No? I didn't think so. But being a mime is such an easy costume to pull together, even if you decide to avoid the white face paint altogether (like my lazy self), since you can interpret it any way you want. There's also something exciting about putting make-up on your face where it doesn't usually belong. Plus, you're also fulfilling your scary quota since mimes are really scary. What are they thinking? Do they feel real emotion? Who are they? But also, you can avoid talking to people at Halloween parties because you're a fucking mime and you have to stay in character.

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2. The Instagram Obsessed Style Blogger



So I can't even really qualify this as a costume because, I mean, come on. Come on. This is pretty much me on a daily basis if we're being honest with ourselves. But the only extra effort required for this costume is creating an orange Instagram notification bar, which I just cut out and glued together using some leftover construction paper. You can even go the extra mile and attach it onto a headband using some skewers so your arm doesn't get tired all day. This can really work for an Instagram obsessed [fill in the blank here]. Instagram, YAS!

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3. Wednesday Addams



So this costume was quite honestly the easiest thing to put together. It helps that I have black hair, but seriously, it's pretty much at the 5% effort level and it gives you an excuse to be a pessimistic, badass bitch the entire day (not like you need an excuse). But since there's not much else to say, let's take some time to say, "HELLO, JEN'S FOREHEAD." I know you should love everything about yourself, but this forehead...sometimes we just don't quite get along. It's not too big, it's not too small, but there's something about it that rubs me the wrong way...which could mainly be because of the fact that it's been hiding under my bangs for almost a decade. It's like when you're in the dark movie theater for hours and then you emerge to the horrifyingly bright sun and fall to the ground from like you're Dracula or some shit.

Anything items you want to see featured next? Anything from my closet? Girl, tell me what you want, what you really really want.

When a Sweater Kicked Some Ass


Urban Outfitters Red Knit Sweater (similar), Love Culture Striped Pencil Skirt (similar), H&M Black Thigh-High Socks (similar), Black Combat Boots c/o LuLu*s (similar), Urban Outfitters Black Mini-Backpack (similar)

I have an entire section of my closet dedicated to my small collection of loyal sweaters and, surprise surprise, they're all within the neutral color palette. It was as if my sweaters all came to an agreement that only the grays, browns, and blacks were acceptable and all other colors got the "You Can't Sit With Us!" treatment. But this bright red sweater is a bad ass motherfucker and it gives no shits, so it MADE room in that fluffy little pile. It made room and then it dominated.

Welcome, new favorite sweater.


Kicking Ass in All Black


H&M Black Turtleneck Crop Top (similar)Red Oversized Plaid Shirt c/o Sheinside (similar, similar), Black Tanya Jeans c/o Level 99 Denim (similar), Urban Outfitters Black Mini-Backpack (similar), Black Combat Boots c/o LuLu*s (similar)

This is essentially my fall uniform this year. A simple color palette consisting of a basic top, black jeans, and my black boots...all topped off with a shirt tied around my waist (in case the ever-changing, indecisive weather decides that yes, it does want to be cold as fuck).

But speaking of my black boots, I'm preeeeetty sure that back in March I posted about saying goodbye to them since the heel of the left boot was coming loose. Well I'm a big ass liar because I'm still wearing them almost everyday now that it's getting chilly out again. I'll get them repaired eventually so I don't look like such a mess walking all around the city, but I was just too in love and I couldn't do it. I couldn't say goodbye. Boots, I'll never leave you.


So Nice We Biked It Twice


Forever 21 Black Knit Cardigan (similar), Urban Outfitters Striped Turtleneck Crop Top (similar), Beige Skater Skirt c/o LuLu*s (similar), Urban Outfitters Floral Garter Faux Thigh-High Tights (similar), Black Combat Boots c/o LuLu*s (similar)

Almost exactly two years ago, Jeremy and I went bike-riding in Dobbs Ferry. We took some cool shots of my outfit. Yesterday, Jeremy and I went bike-riding in Dobbs Ferry. We took some cool shots of my outfit. In the exact same spot.

We're killing it on the new adventures front, you guys. Killing it.

But seriously, when an adventure is beyond incredible there's no shame in repeating it all over again. Hell, I should have taken it to the extreme and forced us to wear the exact same outfits. But then again, where's the fun in that? Also, that's just too much. But the interesting thing, looking at both sets of photos, is that it seems like two year ago the fall weather was way further along with the whole "leaves changing colors" thing. Meanwhile, Mother Nature is reading this blog post all like "bitch, you don't know my life." But regardless, please notice that the white, wooden barricade at the end of the path is still holding its own. You go, wooden barricade. Shoot for the moon.


White Sneakers and Unavoidable Scuffs


Forever 21 Denim Jacket (similar), H&M Striped Crop Top (similar), Roxy Olive Green Pants c/o LuLu*s (similar), Urban Outfitters Textured Mini-Backpack (similar), Converse Chuck Taylor All Star Canvas Sneaker

These Converse sneakers have been on my wish list for an embarrassing amount of time but for some reason I never got around to actually owning a pair. But then I finally grew a pair and went for the purchase even though I knew I had a fear of owning white shoes. I'm not known for taking very good care of most things I own (electronics know they're entering their own personal hell once they enter my hands) but fuck it, I'm an adult, right?

...and then at some point during the two minutes between leaving my apartment and stepping outside the apartment building, during my first test run, there appeared a scuff on the side of my left sneaker.

I was so unbelievably careful to take only the lightest steps and to this day I still can't figure out what scuffed them...but it happened. And it was on my watch. But now I'm too committed and these sneakers are just going to have to accept their ultimate future as soon-to-be brown shoes.

Time's a tickin'.


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